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I Need Sleeping Pills
I need sleeping pills. My sleeping pattern is so fucked up now. It’s 6 am now and what am I doing? Am all still wide awake.
I feel so fat and bloated right now. Maybe because when I’m emo I eat, so I’m gonna have a hell of a time to lose it all. Need to starve myself next week. Watching Hell’s Kitchen isn’t helping either because the more I see them cook, the more I wanna cook and eat. It’s also funny to see the contestants getting injured by the kitchen utensils. I also find Gordon Ramsay to be strangely intriguing.. maybe cuz he’s British and I love guys with British accent.
I’m hoping by next week I can concentrate on my work again. Argh, my community sites are being neglected. I’m gonna have a hell of a time to update the scripts and all. I’ll say, if I don’t start working on them by tomorrow, then I better move my ass and find a job… I miss PJ so much, and I’m dying to go back there and find work there…so tempted… but things that are holding me back are the apartment and cats… I hate my apartment. No wait, I love my apartment…just despise the people there.. and the scary elevators..and I have so many stray cats that I feed daily and somehow I can’t part with them anymore.
Oh did I mention there’s 2 new kittens?
Not mine, and don’t plan on keeping them or taming them. It’s a complicated story…and apparently all of my outdoor cats are connected one way or another…lover,mother,cousin yada yada haha. I’m keeping my 2 kittens in my kitchen. The cat bite on my palm and puncture wound on my left index finger somehow still hurt if I press on them.. or if something like my table right now touching it. Why is it still not fully healed? It’s been a week. I’m finishing the antibiotic already even though I was supposed to finish it few days ago but I’m bad at taking pills. I hate pills. 2 days ago I found a lump behind my ear. Could be ‘cat scratch fever’. Thank God it’s gone now though. My arm also no longer hurt from the injection.
Alright I should try to get some sleep now.
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I sleep when my body is tired, which is always at the wrong timing during the daytime. The only bad effect from insomnia is that when you have to do something during the daytime, you feel very drained.
Good thing about insomnia… I can party all night looooong.
Also, that’s why I haven’t taken any sleeping pills since I had insomnia almost 17 years ago..I know it’ll soon be an addiction.
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Tany, your in the toughest startup founder state right now. Needs extra discipline and its lonely.
Observing some friends, three approaches.
1. You need to get super motivated what this does is remove distractions (because your so driven to overcome what others say you cannot do)
2. Find a co-working space. A Starbucks will do if there isn’t any like @thenetworkhub . Go there on regular basis until you find others to work with, because sometimes just need a co-founder to work with socially to bitch each other out and pressure each other when needed.
3. Attend @startupweekend linky, prob you can contact Malaysian team and find when is next. Also some folks gather a team before the SUW and just go to get spurred on. Its 54 hours none stop. No sleep focuses the team on the focus.
Skype me if you wanna talk thru
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Been there with insomnia. Its aggravating but it is NOT dangerous. When you’re body is actually tired you WILL sleep.
Sleeping pills become an addiction. Always they do. You’ll need one every night to induce sleep. Then you’ll need a different pill to get moving after you wake up. Another pill to help you eat, then some pills afterward to help you lose weight. You’ll become another Michael Jackson.
Insomnia is not dangerous. Laugh at it.