Sorry people. If you came to the site since couple of days ago, you may have noticed that my blog has been FLAGGED as being a suspicious site…

I had absolutely no idea wtf was that o.O

But it’s true, when I loaded my site, my antivirus warning told me that my site is distributing some kind of trojan. I have no idea where the fuck that came from, but after that I deleted any links I see suspicious, I don’t think it’s distributing trojan anymore, I’ve asked google to re-review the site again and I think my site has been deflagged. Let me know if you still see it flagged.

This past 2 weeks had been extremely stressful to me but the hellish part is sorta temporarily over. Tell you about it tomorrow. I decided to treat myself with Dominos Pizza tonight as part of stress relief. Now I just need some wieght loss pills to kill the fat I’ve consumed and to stop the weight I would be gaining from tonight :( :(

…

I HATE GROUP PROJECTS.

Shoot me,k?

Wtf is wrong with the people in my group? Why the hell don’t they care about failing it?????? And why the hell are they dragging me in????

Fuck this. I’m not gonna bother with this shit. I’ll do my work I need to relax myself before my blood vessel bursts.

I want Pn Ju. I want her to do what she did with that fucking Jeya. I want her to YELL at her in front of the class for not cooperating in the group. If only Pn Ju is my lecturer now…….

Me and Jackie called Dura. She wasn’t answering. Called Halili. Wasn’t answering. Called Ito… HE FORGOT. He wants to do the work tomorrow. Is he fucking kidding me? Why not just kill me and be done with it… so I don’t have to go through the embarassment of not having anything to present on presentation day.

On the brighter side however, yesterday I met with Bryan at Centrepoint to discuss our presentation. Never knew he’s a fun guy. Always thought he’s a quiet guy. We have lots in common, especially on Japanese culture and language. First we discussed at McDonalds…he treated me banana pie, yum. Then couple of hours later, i went back to my place to get my laptop charger and went to pump gas..since burger king is there we thought we’d discuss there…wanted to go to the malls but too many people.. So we just sat at burger king until 8 pm discussing our presentation.

And we finished our presentation, and luckily our presentation today was not bad at all! Ms Jenny didn’t say much on it, and thought it’s ok. We’re both happy and relieved about it. At least that’s something good.

I’ve written about mesothelioma before right?

Ahhhh.. I was looking at websites and I found this website that sells slipcovers for sofas and chairs. OMG is there anything like that sold in Malaysia? Cuz I need something like that so badly. Remember when my house was broken into and the took one of the cushion covers to use as like a bag to put our stuffs in there? Those fucking bastards… because of that my lovely Fella Design sofa that we bought for over $1000 looks very retarded now. We went to Fella Design to see if they can duplicate the cover but unfortunately they don’t come up with that design anymore… :( We tried everywhere else even private tailor but it’s too hard to make.

Plus my sofa looks icky now. And I sleep there when I go back so that’s why I always get my asthma when I sleep on it. So having a slipcover would fix a lot of problems. Argh where can I get it in Malaysia? :( :( :(

I want to vent about people and college but since I can’t do it openly I might do a privately. I think I’ll make it password protected so no creeping eyes can see.

It’s hard when both of my phone lines are barred now. I can’t message or call my friends. I don’t have the money to pay for it because of the stupid fucking monitor. I’ll have enough by the end of month around $300+ (RM 1100) but blah… so much money but will be gone within a blink of the eye… Hopefully I can get cheaper good monitor and I have some left to spend.

It’s easier with credit cards for emergency :( Students can’t have credit cards. When I see the smart balance transfers website, they have cards for student. So unfair. I want one. I want to pay my bills now. I want my phone line back.

Soon I’ll blog about college stuff in a password protected entry. Rahhh. I’m not in a good mood. Stress is taking its toll on me.

Today was well.. I don’t know… I was awake at 5 am finishing the rest of my screenplay treatment.. I was so stressed about it… plus I had meeting at 11 am or 12 pm. Well, I had a feeling we still can’t get a the whole group together.. there’s ALWAYS someone missing.. and my prediction was right when Dura text msg’d me saying she couldn’t make it. I got there at almost 12 pm and Nesh was the only one there.. and she’s not in our group anymore! Well she’s deferring the whole semester so she won’t be taking the class. Great. We lost our leader. Then found out Bryan couldn’t make it either. He at least called me to explain his ideas. Dura? eh…… but great that Halili showed up right after, then Ito then Jackie. So we got to discuss some ideas.. relaxed, finishing treatment then went to the library to go online for Bryan to discuss ideas but he never turned up. Go figure.

Btw, why is the library so hot? No air cond? WTF? With a whole room full of students and no aircond? Just a little bit at the doorway? WTF?

While me, Jackie and Lili were in the think tank sharing with some other people.. we were joking and discussing stuff.. and we were laughing our ass off.. lol Lili and Jackie were hilarious. Scriptwriting class was nothing.. we just watched movie that’s too slow for me. My treatment was eh? according to Mr eddie. lol But me and Ito presented our ideas and he was actually ok with two of them.. FINALLY. After lots of ideas down the drain. Hopefully tomorrow my group will show up because if they don’t, I’m seriously gonna be pissed. It’s the last day for discussion before handing storyboard on Friday and there’s still people not showing up? That’s too much!

Anyways. Prolly tomorrow I’ll blog about Tuesday. It was a disaster. But I’ve finished my clay character model yesterday YAY! See, if I do it alone, I do it at my own pace and finish it on time. Blah. I hate group project. So now only drawing left which I’ll do in a bit.

I feel that I need new glasses.. my glasses is from form 3 (10th grade) so that was long ago. And I want with style like some of my friends are wearing. Like at zennioptical.com, they have like a few designs that I like (some resembles my friend’s glasses).

This is like the simple one but a lot better than my current one.

Look at the sides, it has cute design! Like flowery…

This one too.. like little small flower or something.. with red frame XD So cute and stylish.

But unfortunately… argh, it all cost money and I still have like 3 weeks left to get my monitor. Speaking of monitor, BIG HUG AND KISS to my baby Aaron for giving me $50 to help me in my monitor ‘fund’ lol. Love ya. I’m still not quite there yet. :( If I’m going for the cheap one, it’s enough but I’m going for a good one. Oh well we’ll see.

Dear God,

I have a question for you. What big sin have I done for you to punish me like this? I wanted to enter college to pursue my fave major, and to prove to people that I’m not some lazy dumbass as everyone thinks I am. I can do things if I put my whole heart into it. I can do better than I used to when I the passion for it.

But why? But why am I making my life even worse than it already is? Am I cursed with having problems with group projects? Why can’t I just go through a group project smoothly?

I’ve tried so hard in getting everyone together. Even if they don’t do the work, I willingly sacrificed my time to do it for them. I’ve wasted money messaging and phoning but sometimes I get no reply at all. I’ve begged for cooperation. But that ends up useless. Things always come up the last minute for everyone, which end up leaving me alone. All alone. Depressed. Frustrated. I can’t yell at anyone because I’m not like that. They’re my friends. I’ve felt what it’s like to be yelled at. It hurts. So damn much. I’m not doing the same.

But what do I get by being nice? I’m on the verge of failing. First phase already fucked. What more? As I’ve always said, I care about my grades. If they wanna fail, well be my guest but DON’T DRAG ME IN. I’ve worked too hard to give up now. I don’t want to give up. I wanna stay strong but how long can I last? There’s nothing more worst than failing a subject.

I always finish my work on time. Maybe there’s once or twice I didn’t do so but that was my own mistake but I always put my whole heart into what I do. Never half-assed. To people I’m still bad from whatever that happened last semester… even though I’ve tried so hard to fix my image and reputation now, but seems like it’s done nothing. I’m not bad. People make mistake. I did too. Why can’t you forgive and forget? I have.

Am I so bad, that I deserve all this bullcrap? Have I done something wrong to deserve this?

Signed,
Suicidal Anonymous

After the DVD ruined my DVD rom in my lappy, and after exchanging it for the new one, I finally get to see it tonight.

When I first the cover, that’s what caught my interest. I mean, the cover look ultra gore, like a good horror movie. Plus you can see what the review said - “One of the best zombie films in decades“… then I got on IMDB and read lots of bad review…plus I found out it’s a low budget movie so I thought “Oh no… a low budget horror movie.. there goes my interest..here comes bad acting, bad movie that would be so painful to watch…”

…But I actually like the movie o.O;;;;

It’s the kind of zombie movie that I love - an extreme GOREFEST! Lots of blood…lots of flesh eating thing and you know what? For a very low budget movie, they have some of really AWESOME effect! For example, there’s one scene where a zombie punches a pregnant girl’s belly and rips out her fetus and eats it.. and she screams “MY BABY” before dropping dead shortly after… Another awesome scene is when a girl gets her jaw ripped out..and you can see her hanging tongue… I’m impressed!

And guess what? It was only a $30,000 budget with 9 days of total shooting! o.O; Again, I’M IMPRESSED.

Okay, what I don’t like is that the movie has no plot at all. I’m ok with that because it’s totally a gorefest. But because of the no plot, you don’t get to know the characters.. ok, so you know the main character (the guy) and this black guy with a trademark brass knuckle. That’s it. You don’t get to know much of the character and you don’t feel sorry for them. Nevermind the bad acting though. Believe it or not, it’s bearable to watch unlike other low budget movie. Ok, there are some bad actors and bad moments, of course.

AND THE ENDING…….argh, it’s frustrating because it’s like middle of the movie and then WHAM - “TO BE CONTINUED…” like ‘Back to the Future’ style… hopefully the director would get enough fund to make the sequel “AUTOMATON TRANFUSION: CONTINGENCY” because I want to know the ending. It’s like totally hanging….

Not a bad low budget movie. Lots of gore, zombie action, and cool dvd cover lol.

UPDATE: According to IMDB, Automaton Transfusion: Contingency is in the making! woot.

Now I got to sleep. It’s like 5 am.

Argh, I went to the mall today and guess what? It’s sale time!… and I have already spent all of my money :( Well I used like $200 of mom’s money today though buying like girly beauty stuff lol. I want new shoes though but look at this!

I have never seen Vincci that crowded in Ipoh before! I mean in KL sure, it’s hella crazy during sale time but Ipoh? That’s mad O.o; And I’m not even sure if there’s any sale in that store.. hm I’m not sure.

Oh btw, my DVD rom is broken. Blah.

Yesterday was tiring. I sent mom to pay for something. Then to the nearby mall to exchange the fucked up DVD that I bought (and that ruined my lappy’s DVD rom), went to comp store, went to buy fruits, went to relative’s house, went to rental house then only back home. Argh.

One more day for midterm break. Then back to hell. I’m so not looking forward to it. You know what? I can already feel something terribly bad is coming soon. I think I’ll fuck up my presentation skill class on Monday because I was absent last week and I don’t know what’s up for this Monday. So that’s 2 day’s marks gone. Fuck me. I’ve asked a few different people about what’s the topic for Monday and what did they answer me? “I don’t know.. I’m not sure either”. Dura wanna be in my group  but no, she hasn’t replied my message in facebook. Going to message her on myspace but if she’s not responding, then screw it.

I’m watching “Honey” movie now… Jessica Alba is so hot in this..I so envy her sexy body and flawless skin. This is one of my fave movies. After this I’ll work on my assignments while watching my zombie movie that I bought called “Automaton Transfusion” (???? what kind of title is that? Tho it does sound cool o.O) Apparently this movie got bad review. OH well.  I’ve watched Dead and Gone, which is cool. The movie has really awesome cinematography though it’s not really a zombie kickass action movie. More hallucination video but it’s still great XD Living Hell is well…. alien-ish movie. Not zombie >.<

Ok enough blogging for today.

PS: I had BIG APPLE donuts today… omg so yum. I missed it. Because Seebe commented about Krispy Kreme in previous post, I suddenly had the urge to eat donuts today lol.

I was just looking at old posts of mine and was reading this:

DECEMBER 2006 POSTS

I wished I didn’t go for the treatment at the dermatologist. Was a big mistake. Plus I miss buying tv shows DVD on amazon. I read the part when my ex won some money playing game and he’d give half to me. *sighs* He would always give money to me without asking if I want to or not. Oh how I miss that 2 years of his generosity.. having someone giving money to you even when you don’t need it. You know, just for spending sake. Oh well, that’s in the past. He changed after that. Even though I’m not financially tight now as I used to be, but you know it’s nice to have someone pamper you. That’s just what girls need. Trust me guys, girls like stuff. So do take note. Love *only* is not enough. You’ll get very frustrated girls. They won’t voice out their frustration in front of their bfs, but they use forum and  girl talk between girls. lol. And that’s what I’ve been reading this past couple of days lol. Girl frustrations.

This past few days I’ve been into a malaysian forum for girls, and most girls would prefer guys who could spend money on them…be pampered. Malaysian guys are not usually generous. Trust me. I’ve seen them. Unless those ‘datuk’ or really rich old guy who are the sugar daddy for young, slutty girls. Yuck.

Speaking of rich, I was doing cruise ship research for my screenplay…and there’s this new ship called “Oasis of the Seas” if I”m not mistaken and OMG…. it’s soooooooo friggin nice!!! OMG. I’d kill just to be on that ship for a day. You know what… I want my honeymoon to be on a caribbean cruise on that ship…. like 10 days of pure luxury (no I won’t settle for cheaper room..must be the most expensive room)….omg if someone takes me on that cruise ship, I’ll be that person’s slave forever lol.

I’m regretting I didn’t bring my PS2 back to Ipoh so I could sell it, and buy a new one. You see, my PS2 is the old expensive and hacked and HUGE! Like majorly huge. Now I see at the malls, and it’s like triple sized smaller than what I have. I want it. I also want a PS3 but that’s like wishing for a star.

Ok. Enough blogging for today. I have more tomorrow. My break is ending. ARGH.